Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Day 363 - Requirements for life on earth: Shelter for the physical body pt1


I continue the series of addressing myself with self-forgiveness statements to the content of the HUMAN RIGHTS as laid out by the Equal Life Foundation. In doing so I am forgiving my misconceptions, immoral and delusional attitudes, the accepted transmitted cultural beliefs, my fears and self-interest in understanding and realising the inevitable situation of change that is required to create a world on the trajectory of well-being for all equally, and in doing so end the need for survival, self-destruction, abuse and suffering. 

The fourth Human Right as stated by ELF:

4. An Equal Housing Right that assures every being and every family a stable home environment that is nurturing and supportive of life, properly founded within communities that assist and support a life of dignity and integrity. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that housing needs to be rented/owned and is not a right as with the Equal Housing Right stated by the ELF, so that I can justify having to make money because paying for housing consumes a large part of my income and serves as a measure and permanent display of my status in society. 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place status above physical comfort in housing by having created a society where I have tied money to the ability to have physical comfort in housing and therefore can only have physical comfort in a house/apartment if I have sufficient money. 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to segregate communities by the quantity of money that is available to them - poor people live with poor people and the rich with other rich people - and create social provisions and infra structure according to monetary availability so that those with little or no money end up unsupported and neglected while those communities that have a flow of money thrive and prosper. 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the size of one's home property has a proportional relationship with how much money a person has, how much privacy a person can buy with their housing, and how much influence a person has over others and the system in general - where I do not realise that these proportional relationships are relationships of abuse because all material building blocks for these relationships are resources that are given freely, yet this is systematically confuted to protect the interest of those with influence, and deny others an equal share/access - all by having created a cycle of relationships between housing-property-privacy-influence.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my house/apartment is a "temporarily ok situation" but not good enough and certain for the future, therefore I need to work harder to make more money so that I can afford better housing, because as I get older I need to be secure in my physical comfort and thus I need to reflect this dependency in how I dedicate/commit myself to the system and invest into my performance within the system to secure my future.  
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have institutationalised the idea that “housing is ownership” which serves to enslave everyone because large sums of money have to be borrowed and paid off over a life time, and this represents a sacrifice I am willing to make to ensure that I I am going to be ok in old age. 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have abused the concept of “sheltering the physical human body” as housing/ownership/property by making it a point of separation, by allowing and enabling for housing to be a point of consumerism with no limit of what can be conceived as long as there is a monetary equivalent which has spurned a large industry of consumption for the wealthy with ongoing developments of housing "life styles" that satisfy the taste of luxury and consequentially abuse resources that belong to all equally as they are given freely by our earthly environment.  
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Day 362 - Requirements for life on earth: The seed of human life pt2


In this post I continue with the third human right as stated by the Equal Life Foundation.

Self-corrective Statements on the 3rd Human Right, the Right of the children:

If and when I am made aware of the atrocities that concerns the childhood of children and I react in disgust and disbelief, I stop and breathe, I realise that my reactions do not change the world, and that only if and when I take responsibility in every way, in all ways that hide from myself, will I be able to direct myself and thus contribute to changing this world.  

I commit myself to stop my brainwashing by dedicating myself to my process of writing and deconstructing myself so to emerge as human in equality. 

If and when I justify not having children because I recognised that adults are incompetent and violent in raising their young, and therefore opted out in a moral stance, I stop and breathe, I realise that this is a point of separation where I do not solve the problem by swaying in the opposite direction where I satisfy myself in self-interest with a reaction in response to a "bad" situation, but see, realise and understand that I must actively contribute to the interactions with children to establish myself as equal in this point. 
I commit myself to find ways for social interaction with children and stand equal with this point. 

If and when I recall my own childhood and recognise the fears I had growing up, I stop and breathe, I realise that the child-parent dynamic is a child's first encounter with fear, handed down from generations because no one has seen it their responsibility to investigate and change this situation. 
I commit myself to stop all my fears and investigate how we have accepted fear as ourselves, so to understand what must be done to release fear from earth. 

If and when I judge others in separation of myself, I stop and breathe I realise that everyone comes into this world as equal life force and that all else that deviates from this basic point is not real and within that I realise that we have accepted a delusional world that uses abuse and suffering to enact the illusion. 

I commit myself to disillusion myself in every way so that I can see what needs to be done to create a world of equality.

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Day 361 - Requirements for life on earth: the seed of human life pt 1


In this post I address the third human right by the EQUAL LIFE FOUNDATION. It concerns the right and protection of the children. The simple reality is that if we want to create a better world we have to start with the ingredients of that world. Procreation is the human ingredient for the "making" of a world. Therefore, we must recognise that changes have to start in how and why we procreate, and how and why we raise children the way we do. But these questions cannot just be addressed to a few but must be addressed to all because all adults and all children of the future create the collective of society together. A human right for a child is thus a first step of orientation for each adult to be measured against in how the individual takes responsibility to shape the world through their interaction with children because the child-adult and/or child-parent relationship in turn shapes the child for the rest of his or her life (cf. developmental research e.g. Piaget)

3. An Equal Right of Safety and Security for every Child, so that a life free of fear, insecurity and trauma is assured, a life in which parental guidance is balanced with freedom of expression and lived within an environment of creativity and joy so that every Child grows into his or her utmost potential as a unique expression of Life Itself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have spent my childhood in fear of my parents and have not done anything about this situation so that all the children that came after me do not have to suffer in the same way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have traumatised myself throughout my childhood through being physically disciplined by my parents because I understand that the monetary system we have created does not allow adults the security and freedom to get properly trained for parenthood, and thus adults like my parents refer to violence based on belief and incompetence - and in this I realise the urgency of needing to change into a system of equality where procreation is dealt with based on equal consensus and not as a biologically-determined right.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have never felt secure as a child and thus have developed myself into an insecure adult who does not trust herself and suppresses her expression because I fear that the world isn't a safe place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow a world to exist where there is no protection for children because children are left to their own devices under the guise of "privacy of the family" so that abuse exists in every way and that a child's childhood is a string of abuse situations across all domains of the physical body e.g. food, sex, movement, which creates long term consequences for the child's cognitive, emotional, and physical development - and thus starts over the cycle for a world of abuse and suffering.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have never allowed equality of life even though it is obvious that all life is equal because all children are equal when they are born into this world where only family relations and society indoctrinate the child to be a "separated being" who exists in polarisation through comparison and judgement and is motivated by self-interest.
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Sunday, May 12, 2013

Day 360 - The memory of the broken window pt1 & 2


I am posting this from my personal log of self-forgiveness/self-corrective statements, and thus interrupting the series I have started on human rights momentarily. I have been having a left eye twitch for a few days now. This morning in the shower I put my hand on my eye and asked myself why is my eye twitching? A memory came up that I have already forgiven in the past, in fact several times. 

The memory is about me - I have 6 years of age and am walking home from my grandmother's house which, at the time, was very close to my parents' house. I lived in neighbourhood with lots of children, and on the way back home I came across a bunch of kids standing in front of a house. Curious about what they were doing, I approached them. As I came closer one of the kids turned around and said "she did it". I then realised that everyone was standing in front of the house because there was a broken window.  I said "no, I did not do it!" and started to run towards my parents' house. It was a Saturday, both of my parents were at home. The kids ran behind me like a pack. I rang the door bell and wanted to run upstairs for protection from the children. 

The scene in my head is me standing in the middle of the stair case and the pack of kids below, and my parents above. One of the kids yelled that I broke the window, and I screamed that I did not do it. I turned to my parents in hope that they would protect me - but they did not. My parents did not even listen to me but took the side of the children and accused me of having broken the window (which in and of itself should have been quite a surprise because I was extremely well-behaved and a very quiet, shy child). In this moment, a world came tumbling down within me. The one people in my life, my parents, did not believe me, did not ask me, did not investigate, did not protect me but betrayed me in this moment. I realise that in this moment I programmed myself to feel inferior in a big way, between my peers (the kids) and my parents (authority) I would repeat this scenario throughout my life. I voluntarily set myself up time and again so that I could experience myself in this way. 
.... and here it goes, I stop. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that when my parents betrayed me, when I was a young child, where I was accused of breaking the window, my parents were scared of the consequences, and therefore where consumed by their fear and reacted from self-interest instead of doing what is best for all, where they would have understood that I am a small child and I came to them for protection.
If and when I have a situation where I set myself up through expectation that a person is going to do “something” for me, i stop and breathe, I realise the moment i do that and I ask myself the question: what do I need to do here to take responsibility for myself? I then folllow up with actions that answer the question. I commit myself to make myself aware of situations where i rely on someone else to be responsible for me, and stop myself by asking questions and answer the question with appropriate actions. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have programmed myself in this moment of standing in the stair way with the kids on one side of me and my parents on the other side -  where I expected my parents to back me up, to believe me, to stand in for me and protect me - but because they did not come through and fulfilled my expectations I  then programmed myself to value myself as less than everyone else, who happened to be other children, so in fact my peers, and thus feared everyone else because that is what I learned in this moment from my parents.
If and when I build up expectations about a situation, I stop and breathe, I look at all the angles of the situation and investigate every angle of the situation and make a plan in how I can take responsibility for each angle of the situation. I commit myself to approach every situation from the point of "how can I take responsibility for this situation in every way" and then proceed by putting a plan in action. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have repeated this scenario with my parents, every time when I expected a "support reaction" from my parents and it was not fulfilled, I reacted and solidified the program and belief that my value was less then that of my parents and all other people involved in the situation, and that I must continue fearing others just like my parents do.
If and when create a scenario with my parents where I rely on their "reactions of support", I stop and breathe, I realise that as long as I do not stand equal to this situation with my parents I will not be able to recreate myself with equal value - with value as life in fact. I commit myself to change this situation by stopping all expectation from my parents and reliance on my parents and determine my interaction with my parents through self-responsibility.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have created a relationship between “my expectation of others in how they stand by me or support me” and “my self-value” where I experience myself as value-less when my expectations are not fulfilled, and this is the mechanism I use to sabotage my Self/Life - where I develop a set of expectations that are unrealistic/demanding/relying on someone else, so that I can then experience myself as value-less when these expectations are not fulfilled. 
If and when I want to engage in this cycle where i create expectation that I use to feel inferior and disapprove of myself to create energetic charges within myself, I stop and breathe, I do not allow myself to create these expectations and I ensure that this is so by asking myself the question, “what I am doing in this situation? and "how am I taking responsibility for myself” I commit myself to push myself gently to ask these questions before I make a decision and then act it out.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have used this mechanism to trap myself time and again, and have then resented the people involved because I have not yet taken responsibility to 1) stop expectations directed to others 2) stop blaming others for my experiences 3) act from the point of responsibility (by asking myself questions e.g. what would I do if this situation does not work out)
If and when I fall back on this mechanism because this is how I have existed for most of my life, and because I have defined myself through it, I stop and breathe, I slow myself down and gentle shift to direct myself by engaging myself with questions about the situation in how I relate to the people involved, and only when I have total clarity I act -  and this is how I step out of this cycle. 

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