Sunday, December 15, 2013

Day 468 - My relationship with a virus pt6






This post is a continuation for :




Reaction dimension:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with anger to Z because I blame him for the fact that a virus lives in my body, which is convenient for me to not take responsibility for my actions and to hide behind the belief that I did not know that he was carrying the virus. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to react with resentment towards men because i have a belief that men are careless and selfish, which is a belief I have based on a memory from my mother in how she assessed men. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with frustration because I can no longer go back in time and undo what I did and save myself from this virus. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with aversion to myself and others who have skin problems because I have a picture of myself with the perfect skin. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in desperation when looking for a cure to be rid of the virus. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in guilt about what I have done to myself and how I have made myself suffer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in shame because others know that a virus has been transmitted to me and in shame I see myself as inferior to others. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with impatience because I can't wait for the virus breakout to heal up and my skin return to normal. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with sadness because I realise that I have to have this relationship with a virus for the rest of my life. 

Commitment:

When and as I react with anger towards Z because I blame him for having the virus, I stop and breathe, I realise that anger creates even more abuse in my physical body and keeps me trapped in my mind. I commit myself to stop any and all anger associated with the relationship I have with the virus and be and exist in equality instead. 

When and as I react with resentment in relation to Z and the virus, I stop and breathe, I realise that i have internalised my mother's belief without questioning it, thus I stop the belief and stop the resentment and take responsibility for my actions even when I was not aware of the consequences - because I realise that on some level I could have made a different decision even if I did not have all information. I commit myself to see, realise and understand that I am in charge of making decisions for myself and thus I create the consequences in my life. 

When and as I react in frustration because I live in a physical reality with a time line and I cannot return to the past physically, I stop and breathe, I realise that this is supportive to my process so that I face myself in what I have created and deal with the consequences. 

When and as I react with aversion to myself virus breakout or towards others with skin problems, I stop myself and breathe, I realise that this is self-manipulation which only I can stop and so I do. I commit myself to see, realise and understand that self-manipulation is trapping me to my preprogrammed behaviour.

When and as I react in desperation when looking for a definite cure for the virus breakout, I stop and breathe, I realise that desperation here is me allowing myself to run away from facing the point because I don't want to accept the reality. I commit myself to stop all desperation and focus on facing the point in all of its dimensions. 

When and as I react with guilt towards myself because of what i have done/allowed to happen to my body for the sake of getting attention and affection, I stop and breathe,  I realise that this is part of preprogrammed design and I am taking responsibility for it. I commit myself to continue walking process and out of my mind. 

When and as I react in shame to having caught the virus, I stop and breathe, I realise that I use the shame to suppress the emotions on this point. I commit myself to stop shame and face the point in all its dimensions. 

When and as I react with impatience because I want to be rid of the effects of the virus, I stop and breathe,  and slow myself down so that I can understand how I have programmed myself. I commit myself to do the work that it takes to understand how I have programmed myself.

When and as I react with sadness because the relationship with my virus is here to stay, I stop and breathe I see this as an opportunity to understand myself. I commit myself to develop a relationship of equality with the virus. 

0 comments:

Post a Comment

 
Copyright © . Is life possible without the mind? - Posts · Comments
Theme Template by BTDesigner · Powered by Blogger