In this post I am continuing with my previous series as it is outlined in this post:
Day 450 - The first steps of learning the inability to communicate pt1
and continued here:
Today I will write on the imagination dimension
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine that I could be a better teacher by comparing myself to the teachers that I am in communication with and that I am seeing in the course of my research, not realising that teaching primary education is not related to my teaching experience and that in this context my imagination serves me to elevate myself from a point of ego.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine that education can be turned around by creating a teaching body that teaches in self-awareness, whereby I am not seeing that parents also need to be made aware of how we have programmed ourselves and that it takes effort and work to walk through one's pre-programed design to become self-directed life in every moment and that I myself are only at the beginning of this process.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine that teaching primary students would be much easier than teaching undergrads because primary students are more willing to cooperate and are less rebellious.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine how the teachers caused the students to suffer from low self-esteem and confidence because of addressing the students within competition and evaluation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine how the teachers must suffer themselves from insecurity and lack of self-esteem.
When and as I imagine again that my teaching approach is better than the teachers I observe, I stop myself and breathe, I do not allow my ego to take a hold of me, I realise that this only serves me to feel good for a moment and keeps me trapped in the mind. I commit myself to stop my ego and ego-based actions.
When and as I imagine that teachers should teach in self-awareness, I stop and breathe and bring the situation back to self, where I am focussing on myself to walk my life in awareness. I commit myself to stop myself from evaluating others in relation to their self-awareness and solely focus on myself.
When and as I imagine that teaching smaller children is much easier than teenagers, I stop myself and breathe, I realise that I am making assumptions and that I am clueless about this topic. I commit myself to stop all mechanisms of comparison and walk my process breath-by-breath.
When and as I imagine that teachers cause the students to suffer, I stop and breathe, I realise that my behaviour is just the same, it causes suffering to others and I am not aware of it. I realise that judgements of this nature is just a form of blame in disguise and so I stop it. I commit myself to stop myself from blaming others and direct the focus towards myself in taking self-responsiblity to change myself and lead by example.