Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Day 398 Death is my wake-up call pt2

Here I follow up from the previous post....

If and when I doubt myself that I am too limited to walk myself out of my mind, I recall that Bernard stressed that mindless living is to return to simplicity, and thus I centre my body physically and breathe.
I commit myself to see, realise and understand that this process that I am walking with everyone else in the group is in form and content simplistic, it does not require me to know or study, I only have to slow myself down and stop my reactions.

If and when I fall back into my memory where I want Bernard to be present and where I allow myself to experience his physical non-presence as loss, I stop and breathe, I realise that this IS my mind and is me wanting to let go of my responsibility that only I can walk my own process.
I commit myself to walking my process no matter what happens in the world around me, i am fully committed to support myself and others to walk out of my mind.

If and when I fear that there is no one in the group who can speak with the mindless authority of Bernard, and that there is in other words no checks and balances, I stop myself and breathe, I realise that self-honesty is the only guide that is needed for me and if there is an event in the group I realise that that I can approach it from the point of self-honesty. I commit myself to self-honesty and let self-honesty be a guide.

If and when I use Bernard's death as a justification to not engage myself in my process and to allow excuses to run my life, I stop and breathe, I realise that consistency is most important for my process and I realise that give as you would like to receive is the principle we stand by - thus will not again let excuses and justifications allow to hold me back. I commit myself to consistency and to pushing myself through the resistances.

If and when I desire for Bernard to be here to support me, I stop and adjust myself physically and breathe, I stop this desire as it is like any desire my ego wanting to be stroked in that I want to victimise myself as helpless. I commit myself to stop all self-victimisation in relation to my process.

If and when I fear that process is going to be harder now because Bernard is no longer around to remove systems, I stop and breathe and adjust myself physically I realise that Bernard cleaned up existence with his death, and this constitutes a new starting point where we truly only have be concerned with us. I commit myself to cease the opportunity to create myself as life.


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