Saturday, May 4, 2013

Day 352 - Negativity drives my life pt13





In this post I continue the series that I started on day 337, where I give background to the problem that I am addressing with self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements.

Summary of the problem:

We all default into negativity. We are unable to see that our lives are a single pursuit from the negative to the positive, in how we want to experience ourselves. We achieve this in all kinds of ways, not at least through education and consumerism. Negativity makes us untrustworthy creatures that abuse life and the living by virtually ignoring what goes on around us as long as we can escape from it and experience ourselves positively - and for that no price is too high. How do we change that? Through self-honesty and self-investigation.



The physical dimension - The solution

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have automated myself to exist in negativity and in that I have created a disconnect between the mind and the body, where I am so completely automated that I don't even notice that I am not the one moving my body, but that the automation is what moves me in every moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have, in my starting point of negativity, always moved the way my mind has been feeling comfortable within my body, and have never realised how uncomfortable my body is - when for example I sit with my legs twisted in my chair or I lie twisted in my bed, or in other situations where I impose postures on my body because they seem to be comfortable, not realising that these postures are only comfortable because I perceive it from my mind as I don't even know what it means to be comfortable as my body - because I live in separation from myself where I impose whatever my mind feels comfortable with onto my body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that from my negative starting point I accept emotions as me, such as anger, anxiety, and disappointment - where I know that it affects my body because I have feedback from the various parts of my body but I'd rather keep my attachment to my negative starting point and all the outflow from it, than honouring my body as the true reality of me here.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to exist within negativity and so have automated myself to perfection, and have never once considered that I have awareness as body and have merely accepted all automation, hailing it as a benefit of human evolution without realising its true nature because the only value I have given to my physical body is to provide me with positive experiences so that I can get away from the negativity.

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