Sunday, October 14, 2012

Day 170, 2012 To decide to run - out of fear.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have made major decisions in my life based on the runaway character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have used reason to talk myself out of facing myself within the points that caused emotional hardship within me and by doing so gave myself permission to run away.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have created a runaway strategy that I have applied throughout my life on points that I found too difficult to handle in any other way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have applied the runaway character when I experienced myself as stifled in my creative endeavours.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have created a belief that I must look beyond my problems, to find the answer to my problems, instead of looking at myself, within myself and who I am in the situation that I experience as problematic.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself that I can work out my fears and anxiety, and within this self-distrust I believe that running away from the situation is the only solution/option I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that self-trust is me supporting me and in that I can take my time to figure out what is going on within my life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself left alone with my problems (when I was younger).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not realised that I can never really run away from myself because I am always faced with me wherever I go and whatever I do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not realised the connective links between desire, expectation and the self-created blockages and trust issues, and in that I have experienced myself in a confused state.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be patient with myself in seeing all the connections in how the programs that I have accepted and allowed as me - in how these 'hang' together in their functioning.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that it is never too late to face myself and stop running away from myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself by creating the runaway tactic to cope with my life.

I forgive mysefl that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself in haste with an urgency to get away from the situation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel a nervousness in my body when I am considering how to get a way from my troubles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to have believed that because 'getting away' was the right choice in one instance it was therefore the right choice in every other instance as well.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress myself by choosing to run away from my problems so that I could 'forget' about what was causing the problem in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deny the relationship I have created to something or someone through obliterating it/them from my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have created self-abuse by choosing to run away from myself.

I commit myself to stop and uncover all the different dimensions where I apply the runaway character.

I commit myself to face myself in every way.

I commit myself to rectify the situations that I ran away from by looking into the thing/person I ran away from and uncover and release all denial and suppression.

I commit myself to support myself to continue to build self-trust.

I commit myself use self-honesty to look at my situations and patiently create stability for myself so that I can make decisions based on common sense and not on a character.

I commit msyelf to recognise the emotions involved and walk out of the thoughts that I believe to be me.

I commit myself to uncover all the instances where I have runaway and work on each point.

I commit myself to get to know who I am free from fear and anxiety.  

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