Sunday, September 2, 2012

Day 129, 2012 Facing the fear of making a mistake and missing an opportunity

Artwork Damian Ledesma
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage my common sense by believing that if I don’t take advantage of a specific opportunity then I will miss this opportunity not realising that I created fear around the definition of what constitutes an opportunity while blinding myself to see things for what they are.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear ‘not knowing’ what an opportunity that is best for all looks like, and therefore reacting with fear to an opportunity that will have some attractive aspects but not others, and creating a holding pattern for myself because I do not trust myself to assess whether the opportunity is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear fear itself and thus I forgive myself to fear my own fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the thought of ‘not knowing’ is the result of fear, and so I react to my own fear by destabilising myself because I fear making the wrong decision.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have realised that I can create layers upon layers of fear which paralyse me directing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate self-responsibility in creating the life I want to live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that an opportunity ‘out there’ can determine who I am within myself and thus I have placed my Self ‘out there’ and thereby creating a religious experience of hope and faith instead of moving myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that I must assess a an opportunity by looking at the confluence of all parts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be able to decipher between my emotions towards a point and my mind’s resistances towards a point and where I further not realise that both, emotions and resistances, are both rooted in fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the first stage in making a decision about any opportunity that I encounter for myself must be to clear all emotions, all fears, so that I am able to enter the phase of evaluating the situation from the point of oneness and equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the kinds of fears involved in having to make a decision about an opportunity are the fear of repeating a negative outcome that I have experienced in my past, and fear of the future in creating a negative situation for myself that I will live in the future.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that fearing to repeat my past and fearing a negative future are in both cases evidence that I am not directing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the only way to stop the past for myself is stop the emotional attachment I have to the past in form of memories.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the only way to stop fearing the future is to create the future for myself in what I am willing to live by directing and moving myself.

I commit myself to see, realise and understand that when “I don’t know character comes onto the scene I must investigate my fears, realise them and walk the self-corrective application.

I commit myself to see, realise and understand that I am the opportunity that is best for all when I stand as equal to all that is external to me and here I realise that describing an opportunity that is best for all, to know what it looks like to stand to the opportunity in separation.

I commit myself to see, realise and understand that my fears are layers and that I must empty myself entirely (through self-forgiveness) before I proceed in any manner with any opportunity that comes my way.

I commit myself to take responsibility for my life and all its opportunities by creating opportunities for myself through self-direction.

I commit myself to evaluate opportunities only once I have done self-forgiveness on the emotional charges of the opportunity and do not believe my mind when thoughts come that tell me otherwise.

I commit myself to evaluate any opportunity in my life by standing equal to all of its parts.

I commit myself to release all memories of my past and their positive/negative charges.

I commit myself to stop all fears of releasing my memories.

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