Thursday, September 20, 2012

Day 144, 2012 Character: Flying the flag of motivation

Artwork Andrew Gable
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a society that believes that motivation is an indication of a person's behaviour who is highly creative and psychologically sound, without ever questioning what underlies motivated behaviour.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a society that values motivation and makes this a prerequisite for success and the earning of money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as the motivated character where I pursue without any hesitation, any doubt, and any remorse that which motivates me without actually understanding what it means to be motivated and without actually understanding that I have created this automated pattern.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that when I am motivated to do something I overcome obstacles, fears, and exhibit patience and dedication to the outmost extend but if I am not motivated non of this is apparent.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that when I am motivated about one aspect of my life and not about another I create separation and inequality within myself and in the world around me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to have 'something' to motivate me, to give me purpose in life and from this perspective I have moved myself throughout my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have shown to myself that I can move myself with energy but have not shown to myself that I can exhibit the same dedication to move myself by just breathing without energetic charge.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that what drives motivation is the desire to create the picture I have of myself in the physical world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that motivation is always driven by a motive and this motive is self-interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the motive of motivation is self-interest and that this is accomplished through competition and judgement against what is here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that memories motivate me to do one thing or another and in that I have not realised that I am limiting myself to exist in my past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that fear can motivate me in the desire to be secure and safe in this world which in turn motivates me to use any means necessary to accomplish this goal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself as proud because I have a mission in life which motivates me in doing one thing or another instead of understanding that when I use the motivated character I mimic the snail biting its tail - blinding myself that I am actually 'doing' something that changes me instead of realising that what I am doing is more of the same old game.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as parents who complain about their children if they do not show motivated behaviour instead of looking deeper into what I am accepting and allowing to exist as, as motivation, and taking responsibility for that - rather than blaming the child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that when I support myself as breathing physical entity here connected to all that is here I do not enter into the rollercoaster of motivation - no motivation, and I create stability for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that when I am acting as the motivated character I am making concessions along the way on points that I am walking, because I am allowing myself to make excuses for my behaviour as I justify these as part of my motivation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my motivated behaviour to speed up my movements and breath, and to contract muscles in my body - I allow motivation to abuse myself through tightening, containing and limiting myself physically.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the "high" motivation provides is followed by a "low" with the effect of 'opposing' emotions/feelings to surface inside of me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that the motivated character, that I accept as me, is abusive and destructive to substance.

I realise that I learned to be motivated as a child where motivation was encouraged and rewarded.

I realise that I learned we as a society believe that motivation is a desirable human trait - and in that I realise that I no longer have chain myself to these ideas and step out of the motivated character.

I realise that that which is created by motivation isn't real but accumulated energy.

I commit myself to stop the motivated character and gently learn to move myself in consistency by applying myself through breathing and investigating the points that I am living as myself.

I commit myself to further investigate the picture I have of myself and use motivation as indicator to dig deeper into the my wants, needs and desire.

I commit myself to look outside of myself for answers and look deeper inside of myself to understand all that I exist as in self-interest.

I commit myself to let go of my fears through walking my process - and to stand one and equal to all that is here so that I can bring about a world of equality in every way.  

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