Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Day 93, 2012 The "coward" character


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear others on whose authority and judgement I depend for my survival.  
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I must play a "likeable" character with others who are in an authoritative position within the system.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that if I do not use my mind in a situation with someone in authority I will not emerge as a winner.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to separate myself from others who I believe have authority over me because I see this as the best tactic to minimise the risk for being judged negatively.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not want to face others who are in authority positions in relation to me because I don't want to direct myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not want to be my own authority because I fear that the consequences require me to change, and I can no longer retract to my "safe haven" of preprogrammed existence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to admire others who are fearless when interacting with authorities not realising that I can be just as fearless. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a picture of myself where I am weak and a picture of myself where I am courages.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear those in authority positions because I fear being punished. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear abuse as the coward character not realising that all abuse is self-abuse and to not face myself as self is abusive.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a memory of my mother threatening to punish me if I do not comply with her demands, exist within me. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on the memory of my mother threatening to punish me if I do not comply with her demands. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define pain, loss, deprivation within the memory of my mother threatening to punish me if I do not comply with her demands.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from pain, loss and deprivation through defining pain, loss and deprivation within the memory of my mother threatening to punish me if I do not comply with her demands, in separation of myself. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that pain, loss, and deprivation are here as me, equal and one in every moment of breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear punishment because I fear death. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that death is only the end of my mind. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing my mind and thus losing my labels and my self definitions. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that the coward character exists instead of self-trust and that her existence must rely on separation instead of oneness and equality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself as the coward character because this way I can create excuses to not deal with what I perceive to be the external world not realising that there is only one shared physical world. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as the coward character because it is a safer to remain enslaved than to tackle the unknown here as me in breath. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not like surprise situation because then I am no longer in my controlled place as the coward character and have to take responsibility for the situation. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to act as the coward character when the situation concerns me but to lose all cowardliness when dealing with authority in someone else' name.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to hide as the coward character because than I can exist in denial of myself and everyone else as me. 

I commit myself to end the coward character and face myself in each person regardless of their position and authority.

I commit myself to stop hiding from the world and from others.

I commit myself to end all fears and realise that fears are a delusion of the mind. 

I commit myself to lose, delete, and return my mind to source and to not pay any attention to my mind's hissy fits. 

I commit myself to see all the traps that my mind erects in an attempt to preserve itself.

I commit myself to lead myself and others as myself to a world that functions in equality and oneness.






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