Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Day 77, 2012 Opposing characters: from dreaming to "just in case"

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play out the character who likes to "dream" that everything will be better tomorrow, whereby I allow myself to fanta-size about the various elements of my life, out of realistic proportion. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play the character who, at all times, is on the look out for inexpensive utilitarian objects, simple little tools, as well as foods, and house/traditional remedies from the various countries I lived in, and to bring them back with me whenever I have the chance to. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have these opposing character tendencies where on the one hand I am happy-go-lucky believing that all things will always work out in my favour where I get what I want/dream about - yet on the other hand I am worried about not being practical enough and thus I plan and prepare in case I am in need of 'something'.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play on the one hand the character that is extremely organised but also be a character that does not care much about organisation and wants to treat the topic superficially. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have these polarised characters exist within me as themes throughout all I do, where on the one hand I am not taking responsibility and don't care about the consequences, and on the other I am compulsively applying myself because I am fearing consequences I create through my behaviour. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that I am a hypocrite within myself but that I readily judge others by their opposing behaviours whereby I fail to see my own. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to see in these characters the tendencies of my parents as my parents are in many ways polar opposites, in terms of the main characters they play, as well as in their general approach to life. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to realise that I have configured my characters from the various characters my parents play, and that I have united these opposites within myself never realising that these opposing characters propel each other to be more extreme in how they play out, the more I acknowledge their existence and identify myself with them.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have created characters out of resistances. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have separated myself from my parents and thus this has allowed me to be in denial about my parents characters which are dependent on my characters, and therefore I have not realised how the character co-dependency has kept me trapped throughout my life. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that characters are view points with baggage and unless I look into the baggage I am not able to stop and delete these characters. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as characters in opposition which causes friction and through this I create energetic charges. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not recognise that the opposing and contrary situations I experience in the external world are exactly reflected as me, the characters I allow myself to be. 


I realise that 'polarisation' is one of the mechanics of the mind consciousness system and thus exists on all levels and that it is my responsibility to investigate polarisation within myself through the characters I play, and stop polarisation/opposition and delete the viewpoints so that I can be here as me, one and equal to all that is here.


I commit myself to identify the characters I have created within myself and to delete them one by one until it's done. 


I commit myself to no longer cater to other people's characters by not catering to my own, and accept to face the consequences as me here in breath. 


I commit myself to steadily work my process as part of the group of people who are changing themselves by deleting their characters, so that we can, together, bring about an equal money system. 

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